The Neighbor’s New Bike

My neighbor got himself a new bike. Now why would that be something to write about? Well. It’s not one of your usual Pulsars or other riff raff. This bike is HUGE…it is one big ( word that rhymes with ‘duck her’). It is almost like one of those bikes that you see in ‘Great American Chopper build off’. Huge tires, 4 exhausts, engine nice and shiny, all black (me like black colour), shiny handles…and the sound it makes when you rev it. HOLY GOD!!!! It is the kind of sound that is quite close to a T-rex screaming up your butt. And the ground around it shakes when the bike is being started. Birds in the trees fly away when it starts up. Street dogs run for cover. It’s one mean machine.

And yours truly is not jealous, but is now feeling totally impotent. Just last week, I finally went to get my learners licence renewed. I have been living on the edge, driving my Activa (yeah baby!!!) for almost 3 years without a licence. Typical hoodlum I am. And when asked for what was the kind of vehicle I was taking a licence for, I glumly replied, “Non-geared two wheeler.” And that was that. The inspector gave me a fairly long discourse on how he is ashamed of me. It went something like this, “Aiii…you are 24 years I say…don’t know to drives motorcycle. I am seeing the girls driving the big big motorcycle…and you not knows!! Shame is not coming for you what? You calling yourself man huh? If college child means ok…but you old person I say…. I not giving licence for this…I giving for geared vehicle…you learn from friend and come…hopeless fellow….you look….girls who came before you are taking licence for geared bike…and you taking non geared. Shameless fellow. Get lost…come back when you learn to drive motorcycle”.

OUCH!!!! I’ve had kicks to the groin area during football which was less painful than that.

It’s not like I don’t want to learn. My parental unit in all their wisdom deemed such things like driving and riding a motorcycle unimportant. “Now is the time to study.” they said. (Yeah right!!! That took me places.) Anyway, I truly feel impotent and way less of a dude. But, there is nothing I can do now on the motorcycle front for now. So I guess I’ll just go on with the silent whir of the Activa engine and hope that some snails and old people get intimidated by the sound of me driving past. Tsk tsk. I don’t even know to drive a geared vehicle of any sort. Does cycle with 5 gears count? In that case, I’m da man !!!