Oh screw it! You don’t want to listen to how I thought 2010 was an awesome year….I got the MBA, I got a job, I have a study loan, I got my fourth tattoo, I got an expensive watch, I got the car….THE CAR!!! Thrilled? No? You don’t come here to read about mundane office stuff like ’10 ways to spend 8 hours in the office looking busy without accomplishing anything’,’ What ties match with which shirts’ or ‘ Office Stationary – How much of it can you take home and how often?’. You definitely don’t want to read on ‘ Why Cloud computing is so hazy a concept’, ‘ How to automate your CRM applications’ or something like that. You come here to read about how miserable life can really be and how to make lemonade when life gives you lemons.
So here goes my prayer for 2011….
Dear God,
First and foremost, forgive all atheists. They don’t know the miracle it took you to ensure I got a half decent education. Singing, “Then I saw my degree…now I’m a believer”. So thanks for that miracle! Now what do I want for 2011? A whole lot of things…. I hope to fight for world peace. Whoa…wait, sorry. Wrong audience! For starters, please ensure life remains interesting enough for me to churn out many more blog entries. My life is almost like a cheap knock-off of ‘How I met your mother’ without a Barney or a Robin….yes, no Robin! Hey, I said ‘ALMOST’! So let’s hope more and more interesting things happen in life…. More ‘Kids… I met this girl in the summer of 2011…. We had a great time, then she introduced me to her husband!’, but I wont be sharing those on the blog….sorry! Jokes apart, I’ve been fortunate enough to meet some really interesting people, so keep that coming.
PS: It would be nice if I could make some money off this blog, or some other writing venture. Fellas from Rolling Stone Magazine….time to make me ‘Almost Famous’.
I also wish that this year, I could lose some weight. 3 months of swimming in the cold early morning waters is not helping much. May I be like a young George Clooney by the time I’m 27…and I don’t mean on the grey hair bit. Am not looking for a six pack or anything, but it would be nice to walk into a store and not ask,’ Is this the largest size you’ve got?’ or ‘Does this come in something with an elastic waist band?’
I really hope that I can go somewhere with my music. By no means am I a good guitarist, but I have a whole lot of heart. And that counts, or should count for something in today’s music world. Please allow me one major concert with/without a band. It would also be great if you can get one of Metallica, Pearl Jam, U2 or John Mayer to India this year. If not, please ensure I make enough money to go abroad for a show. Speaking of abroad, turns out almost all my friends are going abroad. I’m not too crazy to go and work there and stuff, but I would love a holiday there. So please help me save up enough so that I may afford one foreign vacation. Or at least introduce me to a nice wealth advisor. It would also be cool if the wealth advisor was an eligible dame. And not the geeky finance types if you know what I mean. No offence meant to geeky finance types, but why do you have to be so numbers-driven? It would also be cool if you could help me out with some more money too. Bottom-line is one thing….. but I love the top-line too. ( Yeah…and he’s making fun of geekyfinance types. Blaaaaaady MBA fellow.)
Thanks for the whole ‘maturity’ and ‘responsibility’ trip. But it would be nice if I could think a little more with my heart and less with my wallet. Not too much, just a little. Not as little as a smurf….but maybe as little as a hobbit. Yup, that’s about right…..hobbit-little-like. So I hope this year, I can finally buy a PS3 and not say shit like,’ Hmm… make hay while the sun shines but save for a rainy day.’ And end up putting that money in the bank. This ‘Wants vs. Needs’ debate in my head makes me feel old.
At the end of it all, I ask you for the standard gift of ‘patience’…and every year, you pull that GNR crap on me. Dude! I pioneered that joke….don’t pull it on me. No, seriously. With everyone I know living bits and pieces of my dreams and the life I hope for, I need a whole bunch of patience this coming year. Hope that I don’t give in and become a total corporate sell-out. And if I do sell-out, may I be a rich sell-out. May there be less wars in the world, may the price of petrol and onions drop…. I find it ridiculous that I take my car…you know…’my’ car all the way to the Pav Bhaji stand only to see that he does not give onions with the dish. It’s almost blasphemous…Pav Bhaji with no onion. May Manchester United win the league this year…double would be too much to ask for. May I finally get a band to play with/in.
Last but not least, let all my friends and family, and dear blog readers have a great new year ahead and let all their hopes and dreams be realized.
Regards,
The Great One
PS: I have not mentioned you introducing me to ‘The One’ in the letter because that’s a favour I want to take after 2012. You see, if the world is going to end, I don’t see the point in spending time just to see it (effort spent wooing 'The One') all go up in flames( or volcanic lava). So, if we’re still around Dec 20, 2012, then you can introduce me to 'The One'.
PPS: This applies only to God. You mortals may continue to attempt to help.
Comments
Dear God,
Why don't you send him "The One - Almost" in 2011. This way you'll be providing entertainment for the rest of us as I'm sure there'll be interesting stories to hear.
Yours faithfully,
Moi.
I don't mind the temporary arrangement as long as it does not end in me drinking and writing 'Heartbreak' songs.
Know anyone????